30 Day Writing Challenge: Day 29 -Who would you invite to the perfect dinner party? (Dead, living, historical, famous, not famous...)

Now y'all know I'm no good with parties.

How many people do I invite? Should I consider seating arrangements? Should I have ice breakers so that the dead people can get acclimated to the living, and vice versa? Will there be a cocktail hour or do we just do a free for all at a buffet? I know for damn sure I wouldn't cook for all of these people.

Should the location be intimate? Or should it be open, just in case there are fisticuffs? If folks do start laying hands on each other, do I let them fight? You know...for the sake of history? Is the dress code black tie or Ones and tees? Is entertainment necessary? I mean my entertainment is going to be the people watching, but do I have to consider the boredom of others?

If I invite a deceased terrorist, should I also invite law enforcement to balance things out? Should there also be at least one or two MD's in the building? Or at least a nurse practitioner? Should there be a photographer to capture all the greatness? Or will we treat this like a meeting of the New World Order?

So many questions!! But anyway, here's my guest list:

Guest List for the Greatest Party Ever - Or at Least the One with the Highest Odds for Ratchetness

Adolf Hitler - I know, I know. But...I have questions. Lots and lots and LOTS of questions.
Malcolm X - I need to ask him how he feels about 21st century black people.
Martin Luther King, Jr. - I want to ask him if he feels like he wasted his time.
Michael Joseph Jackson - We are going to do P.Y.T. on the karaoke machine.

Ali! Boombaye!!

Muhammad Ali circa 1974 - The Rumble in the Jungle was AMAZING! Personally, I just want to hear the man talk shit.
Mary Minor - My great (emphasis on the great please) grandmother. The love of my life. I just want to see her again. And listen to her cuss.
Samuel L. Jackson - We'll share creative ways to use my favorite word: motherfucker.
Dave Chappelle - We'll swap people watching notes.
John Stewart - I'm hoping this party will become a segment on his show.
Barack Obama - Because every party needs a certain amount of cool.
Michelle Obama - Because I invited her husband and I don't want to get cut.
Bill Clinton - Willie C. is everything. Recognize this.
Hillary Clinton - See my reason for inviting FLOTUS.
El DeBarge - I want him to sing my name in that glorious falsetto. And then we'll hug it out.
Suri Cruise - She's a friend in my head. Check out Suri's Burn Book for all of the reasons why.
The Kid - Because he won't let me party without him.
Florence Griffith Joyner - I need to do a weave check. And ask her if she juiced.
Jay-Z - I want to hear him laugh. And also start a cypher. I'm certain Malcolm X has BARS! We'll find out.
Beyonce' - See my reasons for FLOTUS and Hillary Clinton.
Rick Ross - I'll make sure to have a trough full of KFC and anti-epileptic meds.
Brian Williams - SWOOOOOOON
All of Hubby's ex-girlfriends - We need servers and places to rest our feet. Right?
Olivia Pope - My date for the night.
Huck - We have to talk. I hope he feels comfy enough with me to give me some answers.
Aaron Hotchner (and the BAU) - I want them to interrogate/profile EVERYONE. All Unsubs will be removed from the premises.
Christian Grey - He can sit in a corner and brood.  I just want to stare at him anyway.
Shug Avery -We are kindred spirits, Shug and I. I want to remix Miss Celie's Blues.
Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis - Her style was impeccable.  I want to see it in person.
John F. Kennedy - I want to watch him troll the room for ladies.
Tupac Shakur - He's the GOAT. He has to be in the cypher.
Christopher Wallace - Him and Ricky Rozay can compare bra sizes.

Written by one of the greatest rappers of all times!

Theodor Giesel (Dr. Seuss) - I know y'all lived for One Fish. Two Fish. Red Fish. Blue Fish. back in the day. You better believe his gonna have a round in the cypher too!!
Paula Deen - well somebody has to cook the food
Bobby Flay - He's helping Paula.
Christina Aguilera - Dirty on karaoke. Judge me.
Mariah Carey - We are going trade shade on Nicki Minaj, Kim Kardashian and a host of others.
Bill Maher - There will be enough black women around to make him happy.
Joe Biden - The original gangsta. He's in there for sure.
Jill Biden - Joey B.'s boo is always welcome.

Of course my family and friends are invited. No party is complete without having to deal with their special brand of foolishness. This would be a great time I think. Not that I would really participate. Y'all know I'm a social weirdo. I'd watch it all from a dark corner while taking notes to tell stories later.