I AM Changing!

Amen.

I posted that on Instagram a few weeks ago. I don't even remember what the situation was, I just know that I was doubting myself and somebody came along and confirmed that I shouldn't have been feeling that way.

Well, the same thing happened today. I've been wondering if people could see that changes that I've made as well as I can see them. I've been questioning myself and wondering if what I've done is enough. I know it's not. I know I still have miles and miles of road to travel. I don't know, I guess I'm expecting a neon light or something to float above my head to let folks know there's no danger here... well not as much. 

Anyway, I'm talking a walk on my break at work. I'm feeling down and wondering what else I can do and not really coming up with anything. I duck into the ladies room and almost run into one of the women on the custodial staff. 

We had the following conversation:

Her: You are the girl from the cafeteria.

Me: Ma'am?

Her: You are the girl from the cafeteria. Every time I see you, you have a smile on your face. You always laughing and just enjoying yourself. That makes me smile.

Me: Really?

Her: Oh yes. You always bring me joy.

Me: Wow. Thank you. I guess I just don't have anything to complain about. I'm blessed.

Her: We ALL are.

Then she walked out of the restroom. 

I had never spoken to or even noticed the woman before. But to know that she had seen me. That I had blessed her life in some kind of way! When I tell you I wanted to shout and shuffle in that place? Wooo chile! Ain't no footwork appropriate enough for the magnitude of my feelings. 

SHE BLESSED ME. 

Sometimes God will knock you over the head with the answer to your questions. And for a hardheaded person like me...that's exactly what I need. And he certainly mollywhopped me today.

I have been called a lot of names in my life. But I don't ever recall a time where anyone accused me of being happy. Certainly not a person that brings joy. 

I AM changing. And somebody noticed. Epic y'all. Epic.

Beyonce' knows how I feel...